I have had many people through the course of my career, try to change my natural accent. Essentially, not what I say, but the way I say it.
Some well-intentioned employers did it with a view for me to ‘better’ my broadcast reports, as my accent cannot be categorised in any one natural box.
It has shades of my heritage (I am South Asian, from India), my roots (I grew up in Dubai, a melting point of different cultures) and my life experiences (studied in London, worked for multinationals all my life). Some others plain told me on my face that I have a South Asian accent which will not be understood by most.
If I had listened to one manager in my early 20s, I would have never been a TV journalist. He basically told me that I had the face for radio and a voice for television.
Yes, it hurt. But it also made me reflect on how biases creep up at different times in our career.
Accents equal intelligence?
Another former manager asked me to keep repeating myself as she could not understand my English, and that also got me reflecting on how our intelligence is directly perceived with our accent, and by corollary, how it defines our career path.
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It is clearly not fair -some of the most intelligent people are not articulate or have challenges expressing themselves. Think Marie Curie, the Nobel Prize Winner for Physics and Chemistry, who had to learn a new language in her 20s whilst she was studying in Paris to be taken seriously by her all-male peers.
And while most of us cannot boast a natural IQ as Madam Curie to help us get along in our professional life, or win two Nobel Prizes at that, we can only tend to adapt. So, just as a chameleon who changes its spots to suit its environment to survive, we unwittingly do the same.
A very dear friend of mine pointed this out to me recently, when she said, I have started adopting more North American shades of vocabulary when I speak, a natural shift to my corporate environment. I had no idea I was even doing this. That is how subtle my actions were.
But, do we really need to do this? One could argue if your work is good (or even excellent), then your accent should not be able to define your career prospects. In reality, biases are very powerful.
Biases
You may be sitting in a meeting room with several other colleagues coming from different backgrounds, ethnicities with who are equally qualified as you, and you may start wondering why you are suddenly silencing your opinions. Why you are afraid to express yourself when you clearly know your stuff. Why suddenly this self-doubt creeps up.
It has happened to me many times and I know the feeling only too well. At that moment, I enable others to take the lead, afraid of judgement both from others as well as myself and it is a very disempowering feeling. I know I can do better, I know I have what it takes but I allow my earlier experiences of people telling me about my accent, colour my present moment.
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Authenticity
So, how am I dealing with this when my primary role is that of communicating? I am working on just being myself. Not the NY/London/Dubai/Delhi Prerna but the true authentic Prerna who knows who she is at her core and who leads by example, not by taking on the guise or crutch of some other persona.
That crutch will invariably be used at some time in the future, there is a lot of work to be done to undo the years of being judged harshly, but at least I am taking my first few steps towards it.
In the process, I am finding myself to be more articulate, exceedingly confident in my abilities and more importantly, not feeling like I need to be someone else to further my career prospects.
So, how do we start unpacking?
I am a big fan of listing thing, so here is my list of how I started my process:
- Be true to the real you: There is a reason why you have come this far on the journey that is called life- it is because of the real you. Not the fake, inauthentic self who comes on momentarily and opportunistically. Take an hour off from work and really reflect on who you are, what you stand for and what you’re passionate about. The answer will come to you.
- Remain pure: Does one person’s judgment really matter to you? Trust your gut on this one and let go off the negative comments like a lotus which lets the dirt fall off its petals and yet remains pure. Be that lotus.
- Stop judging: Just as you expect not to be judged, stop judging others who have different forms of communicating. Cut some slack to that difficult colleague as she may be having a tough day at home or may have a sick family member she needs to take care of.
- Fight the fakeness: If the company you are in is enabling others who are not as well qualified as you to get ahead primarily because of the way they speak or encourages sycophancy, then you are probably either going to be very unhappy (most days), will not feel fulfilled (all the time) and will probably not be true to yourself. During times of uncertainty, we all do not have the luxury of leaving, but if you do, then stand up for what is right for you. Your future self will thank you for sparing you the months and years of emotional misery.
- Upskill: We are not all perfect so go take that communications course or whatever tickles your fancy. I am a big fan of upskilling and am planning to take a course on general management later this year (will keep you posted on how it goes!). Your interpersonal skills will improve and you will learn something new.
So, let us go conquer those naysayers, be true to ourselves and more importantly, be kind to each other.
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